Part 2: My EPIC Turnaround

It's amazing what six months can do. Or should I say what you can achieve in six months when you decide that you aren't going to be miserable anymore.

Earlier this year, around this time in May I wasn't in a good place in life. In fact you can read about it here.

I was stuck, static, lonely and I hadn't deep belly laughed in a looooooong time. I wanted to have this amazing beautiful life filled with love, connection, creativity, fun and adventure. I wanted to serve, uplift and add value to the world. But realistically how could I expect to do that when I wouldn't even look after myself? I said 'No' to myself far too many times that I just gave up, hung out at home in my pajamas all day and avoided any social gatherings altogether. I wouldn't even fork out $20 to get myself a well overdue haircut.

Now that I look at it, I was seriously heading towards becoming the neighborhoods cat lady. Oh dear.

I'm no longer embarrassed to admit all of this because when you finally choose to push yourself from out of the dark and into the light, you become mentally stronger pretty quickly.

But the coolest thing about all of this? It's that none of it happened how I thought it would. I imagined it would be a tough uphill battle of pure will and perspiration. That I'd have to start from scratch as some shy, reserved, "damaged" girl. But my sparkle came back almost instantly, there was no shell I needed to come out of. I was already the person I wanted to be - happy, vibrant and fulfilled.

So what did happen?

Well, since publicly declaring my goal I..

• Discovered I had a serious passion for travel!
• Enrolled in a travel & tourism course, became a full time student & graduate in Dec 13!
• Met wonderful, bright & sparkly people
• Re-discovered my confidence, goofiness & humor
• Became the class rep and excelled in all of my assessments
• Re-ignited my social life!
• Flourished in my relationship
• Did more creative projects and now feature them here
• Re-branded my business and added new features I'm passionate about
• Took up photography as a hobby
• Joined a gym & a social soccer team working out at least 4x a week (Zumba's my regular jam)
• Changed my eating habits to the 80/20 rule & LOVE it
• Lost a dress size without dieting, restricting or punishing my body (WOOHOO!!!)
• Lots and lots and lots and lots of play
  
• Scored a dream position at a renowned wholesale travel company right out of course!
• Started creating an eCourse that teaches others how to get their sparkle back
• And went on a big ol' road trip of an adventure with these peeps (my class)..

When I think about it, my epic melt down was more like an epic blessing in disguise. Because if that moment of breaking point didn't happen, if living how I was didn't become as unbearable as it did - none of these last six months would have happened.

And being where I am now looking back, I wouldn't trade that miserable, lonely and isolated time for anything in the world. Because it lead me here to this point. Beauty, love, connection, creativity, fun and adventure. How's that for a mindf**k!?

So my message for you little soul, is this..

You can transform your life.

You can do it in a short amount of time.

You can become the person you dream of being.

You can deep belly, hard-to-breathe, snort laugh again.

You can be vibrant.

Your life can be beautiful and fun and adventurous and whatever else you want it to be.

It is possible. It is doable. You can do it I know it.

I'm fresh living proof!

And because of that the world will never be the same again.

You will never be the same again.

Just take the first step into the light.


Elise xo

30 Things You Love About Yourself

Oooooh does the title scare you? I hope it does... but only a little!

For the last year and a half I have been actively learning about the vital necessity of self-love and how to develop a healthy body and self-image.

I admit, some days it is still difficult to look in the mirror and like the person I see looking back. But the difference is now I know how to handle myself when that happens and I know what I need to make myself feel better, safer, happier, more positive etc..

One of the things I like to do to help myself keep in a positive mindset about myself is to write a list of 30 things I love about myself and stick the list on my wall for a month. The next month I'll rewrite a new list.

As a part of living vibrant, you gotta do some bold stuff and this challenge is a small but bold and significant step for us. But don't freak just yet, I'll go first so you're not doing it by yourself! :P

 

30 Things I Love About Myself

1. I have a contagious laugh
2. LOVE my big beautiful brown eyes
3. (1st stump, haha!) My long silky wavy hair
4. My playfulness and that I can see fun in a lot of things
5. My gorgeous curves
6. (2nd stump, dammit!) How much I care for my friends
7. My obsession with finding the magic in life
8. My super enthusiasm and excitement
9. I love my perfectly straight teeth :D
   
10. And that smile - lights up the world it does
11. My nose can jump in there too, proud of that puppy
12. I love my OCD to organize and decorate
13. LOVE my crafty DIY nature (and my sparkly colored pen collection)
14. (3rd stump, not bad!) I can dance like a MOFO
15. My self taught web design skills
16. Love my personal style and fashion sense
17. I give GREAT advice when friends are in need
18. I'm a damn good girlfriend
19. A freakin' awesome daughter
20. Punctuality for the things I care about! ;)
21. My AMAZING talent and skill as an actor
22. My super SMART BRAIN that has been cramming 5 years of info into 1!
23. (4th stump, better!) The classic 'Elise' facial expressions
24. My humor and comedic timing (even though I never knew I was funny)
25. My secret love of dance movies *coughstepupcough*
26. How emotionally expressive I am
27. My fantastic and wide taste in music - from Ray Charles to Ed Sheeran
28. My sweet writing skills
29. My strong values
30. The ability to see the positive and keep optimistic

Phew! 4 stumps, not bad I say!

Now it's your turn! This is your bold moment, in the comments below I want you to tell me 30 things you love about yourself! I know you can do it & I'm dying to see what you love!

Ready? Go!

Honest Talk Sunday: How are the next 5 years going to play out for you?

How are the next 5 years going to play out for you?

In all honesty, I can tell that these next 5 years are going to be the most transformational in all areas of my life.

I see a lot of travel happening that is both work and life related, as well as a career in travel unfolding veeeery nicely.

I see this online space growing enormously to the point where we (you and I) have built a wonderful relationship and community together as well as it becoming a very profitable micro biz.

In terms of where I'll be, I 100% see myself living on the beachfront in a beautiful modern beach house with Scott (and yes, it's a high possibility I'll be married!)

I will also be my healthiest and fittest and will have built new nourishing relationships with wonderful people who are incredibly like-minded.

To put it simply, the next 5 years is going to be AWESOME. Lots of positive changes as well as big scary challenges that are great for me in the long run.

After the last couple of years having broken down, slowly built myself back up and used that time to build a solid foundation for myself, I can 100% say I am right where I need to be.

I believe that good things are happening for me, I believe that I will achieve every single thing I really want to achieve and I believe with all my being that I can create for myself the kind of life I want.

Now tell me about you m'lovely! How do you believe the next 5 years are going to play out for you?

What are your views on cheating & affairs?

Could you do it?

Would the guilt eat you alive?

What if he did it?

Would you ever trust him again?

That's my biggest concern here.

Love, and even forgiveness can be won back. But trust? That is something that takes years to build - and only moments to obliterate.

How could you carry on being with someone whom you love, yes. Whom you have forgiven, yes. But who you do not trust?

The anxiety. The isolation. The guilt you would feel.

I couldn't continue on like that. Always on edge. I'd have to end it.

What about you? What are your views on cheating and affairs? Are you a forgiver or an ass-kicker?

xo

How to Wake Up Earlier (instead of leaving it to the last minute)

Back in my 9-to-5 days, my morning routine would look like this:

• Alarm rings
• Snooze button
• Alarm rings again
• Snooze button
• Alarm rings yet again & I realize I have 5 minutes to be out the door
• Frantic acrobatics, out of bed
• Skip breakfast, skip shower
• Barely get enough make up on
• Out the door
• Rush, rush, rush to work

It's safe to say I was not leading an intrepid lifestyle! More like a frantic, stressed out and malnourished lifestyle!

Are you frantically rushing out the door every morning without breakfast? Are you always five minutes late to work? Have you tried to create a new habit of waking up earlier by using affirmations and positive thoughts without any improvement? It's no wonder you're tired and fatigued every day! You're going about this from the wrong angle.

How you do your mornings is how you do life. Your morning state is what sets you up for the day, if you're frantic & stressed, you bring that energy into your day. But if you're well rested and relaxed, your day is gonna go a whole lot different!

When I realized I was NOT setting up my daily zen very well, I knew the best approach was to be gentle and slowly develop the habit of getting up earlier over a few weeks. Here's how you can do it too.

How to Wake Up Earlier

1. Set your alarm every day for the ideal time you'd like to get up. So say work starts at 9:30am and you'd like at least an hour and a half to get ready, set it for 7:30am.


2. Then let the alarm go off in the morning, BUT, don't get up. Chances are your mind will be like 'WTF!?' and you'll just hit snooze and that's fine.


3. Keep doing that every morning. What this does is it's training your mind and your body to switch on at 7:30am even if you don't get up.


4. After some time (maybe a week, two or even a month!) you will naturally start waking around the time your alarm goes off and slowly you'll start finding you have energy to get up at that time. 


5. Create a 'Christmas morning equivalent' incentive to get up. This is my favourite part! Once your mind has caught up and knows when to wake, you can give it an extra boost by creating that excitement of christmas morning. What's something fun you can put into your schedule before work? Maybe it's a fabulously hot shower, a delicious gourmet coffee, an exciting book you're obsessed with atm, green smoothie, yoga, a quick walk to your fave cafe, a hot outfit, a hot boy? :P I find I still have child motivation to naturally wake my ass up at 6am on Christmas morning so how can you make everyday Christmas morning?

This has worked for me time and time again, it's about training yourself to create a new habit and rewarding yourself for committing to it each day. That, for me, is the best way to wake up earlier!

Do you struggle with getting up early? How have you overcome it? Tell me your story in the comments below!

Stressed & Overwhelmed: What To Do When Life Feels Like An Uphill Battle

Just before the weekend began, I was feeling a little flat on ideas for my blog and my new aspirations for a career in travel writing. I decided to head toward my favourite bloggers and online mentors for inspiration.

Within minutes my cup was full of love and I was bursting with ideas and all around goodness. But as I continued to explore and read many tools and concepts I started to feel myself getting drowsy, stressed and slightly overwhelmed.

What started out as a fun inspiration boost quickly turned into paralysis and confusion. I tried to write but too much information was running through my head. 'You have to do this, you have to do that. But what about that? How am I supposed to do this. I don't get it? But how do I incorporate this? I can't do it. I can't do this.'

These thoughts have occurred many a time recently so I decided to try things a little differently just to see if I'd get different results. After all Albert Einstein did say, "Doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result is the definition of insanity." (click to tweet).

Needless to say, what I tried helped IMMENSELY and I know they'll work for you if you're stressed out and overwhelmed.


1 // Limit Your Addiction

It's true, sometimes too much of a good thing can turn into a painful, gruelling and overwhelming bad thing. Since I spent last year reading 51 personal development books I guess you could say I kind of got addicted to them.

But after a while my mind was turning into mush when I'd read one book saying you had to use affirmations or nothing works and another book completely contradicting the last book explaining why you shouldn't use affirmations. I wound up confused, not knowing what to do or believe or understand and I realized I just had to pull back on my 'personal development' addiction and choose only a select few books (like 3 or 4 that I enjoyed) because it was starting to drive me nuts.


2 // Take a Luxurious Break

Sometimes overwhelm can be a sign of working too hard or too much. When it hit me I knew that there was nothing else I could do but take a break... even though I tried to fight it.

Your body and mind are wise beyond your years, they know what they want and what they need. If you neglect their needs for too long they can take over and no matter how hard you try to stay "on form" you will be submitted into chilling out.

When I was forced to take a break I decided to milk the crap out of it. I made my favourite hot drink, Milo. I ran myself a super hot bubble bath with lavender bath salts, I put on some extremely relaxing music and melted away.

This took the stress away immediately and allowed me to feel at peace with myself. It was bliss.

Tina Su of Think Simple Now gives 8 extra awesome tips for overcoming overwhelm that you should definitely check out.


3 // Bless Nature With Your Presence

There are serious health benefits to spending time in nature, no wonder it's one of my favourite things to do. There's a big forest 10 minutes from my house so whenever I'm feeling like a caged animal, I will break out and take a long work in the forest.

It instantly boosts my vibe and also helps me center myself. I come back to the reality of the present moment my incessant mind chatter just melts away.

Sometimes it can be a little difficult to get out in nature due to weather or the fact you live in a concrete jungle. This green meditation music will help you to relax and also will make you feel like you're actually out in the forest.

4 // Do Something Super Duper Fun

I decided to go along with Scott to his inline hockey practise game. It was a reason to get out of the house and to be honest, avoid writing. To my surprise there just happened to be a bouncy castle set up at the rink.

Was it for kids birthday parties? Yes. Did I care? No. It was a freaking bouncy castle!

Once I got over worrying about whether I was too heavy to jump on it, I raced up and flipped into it. Then another flip and another and then pretty soon I was doing all types of acrobatics! I was having the time of my life with a bouncy castle and the thought of writing and brainstorming was nowhere to be seen.

Sometimes with all the brain mush happening you can get a little stuck for fun ideas. These two fabulous posts from The Simple Dollar and Tiny Buddha on 50 ways to have fun by yourself and 50 creative & cheap ways to have will help you with all the ideas you need.

5 // For Serious Overwhelm - Take a Nap

Sometimes we can be so overwhelmed it completely ruins our mood and day. We can almost feel paralyzed. In fact I had that exact feeling when trying to write this post. I just could not get started.

I felt the drowsiness set in and so I decided to give in and take a nap. When I woke, I was literally pumped with clarity and focus and was able to write this post immediately.

There are many benefits to taking naps, when I was in Italy I learned very quickly how the Italians like to use the power of napping to enhance their productivity and clear headedness. I found it difficult to just relax and take pleasure in doing nothing but it didn't take me long to adapt and I found that I had more energy and was 'switched on' most of the time.

But us westerners tend to slate it as a waste of time or believe it's 'slacking off' and push ourselves to our limits to earn that extra buck or have everything 'perfect'. Seems like a pointless exertion of energy really.

If things are seriously stressful and you happen to have some free time, take a nap and reset yourself. You'll wake up feeling so much better and possibly even more clear headed.

In the comments below, I would love for you to tell me your best stressed & overwhelmed tip. What do you do to help yourself calm down, gain clarity or just feel at ease? What tips are you going to tke from this post to help you do that?

Letting Go of the "Old" You & Embracing the "New" You

I happened to stumble across the movie-doco 'What The *Bleep* Do We Know!?' which is about quantum physics (and probably a little bit of the law of attraction) and there was one particular bit of information that stood out to me that I want to share with you because I believe it has true relevance to what happens when we feel like our lives are falling apart.

The physicists explained that when we feel an emotion, what's scientifically happening is our brain releases a chemical unique to that emotion into the bloodstream which then signals our body to respond to that emotion in our own unique way.

In non-physicist terms this means that when we're constantly feeling an emotion over and over again (when we feel like we just can't shake it) like loneliness, sadness or even joy, we've actually become addicted to that emotion.

And when we're addicted to that specific emotion, we will consciously and sub-consciously do everything in our power to feel that way as much as possible. Yup, even if it's depression, numbness or inertia. Which explains why we feel so defeated when we're trying everything to change ourselves and transform our lives.

When I heard that I thought "Well wtf can I do now?!" and then there was a lovely part that explained why having that EPIC melt down or feeling like our life is falling apart is actually really really good for us.

When we start asking those questions of "What am I doing with my life? Why am I here? Where am I going?" or start making those statements of "I don't know who I am anymore, I feel lost, I'm not happy" what we're doing is sub-consciously detaching from the old concepts of ourselves.

In other words we are (consciously or sub-consciously) stripping ourselves of our old identities because we're ready to create a new version of ourselves that is no longer attached to anything from our past. The part where we get stuck is in the addiction to those old emotions.

Because we won't or can't give them up we remain stuck in limbo of clinging onto the old version of ourselves while the new version is happily waiting with it's arms stretched out.

So the question really is, how do we let go of the old and what we're chemically attached to and embrace the new?

Well, from my experience so far I believe you have to release your grips by falling into the darkness. That black hole in your core, that emptiness you feel, that heaviness in your heart is where you begin.

That might manifest as an EPIC meltdown or it could be a simple change of heart. It may show up in your choices, you may do something dramatic or finally allow yourself to do something you've wanted. It may come about in owning your power and standing up for yourself or deciding to part ways with negative people in your life.

I found out the hard way there's no amount of physical action that could ever compensate an internal problem. Fall into that emptiness, embrace the heaviness and go into that black hole. I promise you it's not as terrifying as you think and you'll be surprised with what you find.

"Greatness lives on the edge of destruction." - Will Smith (click to tweet)

You Have Permission

Today I want to share with you something I read in my new book Get Rich, Lucky Bitch by my favourite money mindset manifesting coach, Denise Duffield-Thomas.

The snippet I'm sharing with you today is something that was actually written by my favourite goddess Leonie Dawson. This particular snippet is something I found to be the most profound piece of writing I've ever read. It is so beautiful, so sentimental and from deep within Leonie's soul.

I want you to read this today and embody it. Because this is you hun, and you have permission.

You Have Permission by Leonie Dawson


Dearest Goddesss,




Today, and everyday, you have permission.




You have permission.




Today, and everyday, you have permission.




You have permission to say no to demands on your time that don’t light you up, and don’t give energy back to you.




You have permission to not give a crap what’s happening outside your world, and keep your energy focused on what you are creating.




You have permission to let go of friendships that make you feel like shit.




You have permission to say no whenever you like, however you like, in whatever kind of voice you like, without feeling like only Mean Girls Say No and Nice Girls Say Yes. That’s bull. Yes and No have equal weighting – what’s important is if you use them when they are the best thing for you, not out of fear, obligation or guilt.




You have permission to know that Yes is powerful, and so is No. The power comes from you using either from your highest spirit and truest integrity.




You have permission to change. You have permission to not be the person you once were.


You have permission to get angry and self-righteous, and to also glean the wisdom from those emotions. They are leading you to where your boundaries are, and where they have been crossed, and what you need to do from now on.




You have permission to be exactly how you are.




You have permission to not be more like anyone else in the world, even if you think they are better, wiser or more popular. You have permission to be more like yourself, your gifts and your wisdom.


You have permission to not care what other people think of you.




You have permission to not try to change what other people think of you. You can’t ever argue that you are a good person. They will either know you are, or not. You don’t need to spend time with people who don’t believe in you.




You have permission to do things that your friends and family do not.




You have permission to be wild, expressive, truthful, exciting and outspoken.




You have permission to not accept friendship requests on Facebook, or anywhere else in your life. You have permission to block people whenever you like.




You have permission to share as much or as little as you like. You have permission to blog, or not blog. You have permission to Twitter, or not to Twitter. It doesn’t really matter. As long as it’s making you happy, that’s the best thing.




You have permission to suck at a wide variety of activities. It’s okay. You make up for it with your million other brilliance particles.




You have permission to be whatever body shape you like.




You have permission to choose, and choose again. And then choose again.




You have permission to not always be a perfect image of something.




You have permission to be a contradiction.




You have permission to not go to your school reunion, unless it really excites you and delights you, and you would love to really heart-reconnect with people you went to school with.




You have permission to not be interested in the newest fad: harem pants, geek glasses, polaroid cameras, scrapbooking, macrame. You also have permission to be totally obsessed with them, if it makes your heart light up.




You have permission to cut people from your life. You have permission to surround yourself with people who are good and loving and nurturing to you.




You have permission to be a disappointment to some people, as long as you’re not a disappointment to yourself.




You have permission to do nothing whenever you like.




You have permission to make your big dream come true.




You have permission to not do it all perfectly, or have all your shit together.




You have permission to not forgive people. You have permission to forgive people when it’s right for you.




You have permission to think some people are crazy. You have permission to think some people are smigging ice-cream with chocolate and wafers and sprinkles and cherries on top.




You have permission to not have the perfect relationship.




You have permission to not have a relationship.




You have permission to take whatever time you need for you.




You have permission to make ridiculous choices for yourself.




You have permission to use and listen to your intuition. To feel when things are off, and to remove yourself from them, even when you don’t quite know why. You will always find out why. Our intuition is here to serve us.




You have permission to be down. You have permission to be up.




You have permission to still believe in unicorns and fairies.




You have permission to believe in things that other people think are very very odd and strange.


You have permission to not care.


You have permission to believe in things that make your life wholer, richer and deeper.


You have permission to make your own world that is the truest painting of you.




You have permission to suck at colouring in.




You have permission to say bugger off to anyone who has ever told you that you’re not good enough, you’re not worth it, you are not beautiful, you are not lovable and you are not the most divine, wise, delicious Goddess to walk the planet.




You have permission to know that you are.




You have permission to swear when you like, however you like, to your reckless abandon.




You have permission to not be the best of anything – just the best of yourself. And some days, just the best you can do that day.




You have permission to not always give. You have permission to fill your own cup up first.




You have permission to have things around you that delight you.




You have permission to live in a tipi if you want to, or a mansion. Whatever makes your spirit shine is the right thing for you.




You have permission to make choices on whether it makes your spirit shine.




You have permission to know you are a goddess, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Even when you feel utterly human. Even when you want nothing more than to climb under your blanket, or light up the sky.




You are a goddess.




You have permission.




You have permission.




You have permission.

The Conversation We Need To Be Having

As women, our hearts are a deep ocean of secrets (totally stole that line from Titanic). And in our hearts we hold our sadness, our joy, our humility, our love, our pain, our kindness and our loneliness.  and instead of expressing our deep suffering we lock it away deep inside.

What I have observed this week has both surprised and shocked me. I've received messages, emails and comments from... well.. you! Explaining to me how you're in the same boat, you feel like a failure, you're trying to change and you're just miserable anyway.

Yesterday, I posted a comment on Marie Forleo's wall in regards to her (super timely) video she posted. It was about feeling lost & what to do when everything's fallen apart, I highly recommend you watch if you are in fact feeling stuck.

You can read that comment below. (please excuse my poor english, it was 1:30am..)

And (unexpectedly) straight after I posted that comment an influx of replies from women popped up. All who swore I was talking about their lives..

This is the conversation we need to be having more of and it isn't happening as much as it should be.

We need to be talking about our loneliness, admitting our embarrassment at 'failure' and loving our sadness. There's nothing more powerful than feminine support, and the moment we start releasing the burden and the heaviness, healing begins.

I invite you, not to be ashamed of where you're at in life, how much you've let yourself go or how you just can't motivate yourself to try anymore; but to embrace healing, embrace support, embrace love, embrace self-belief again.

Love your sadness, but also love yourself.

I'm here for you if you need me.x

What's My Style?

One of the exciting things about consciously and purposefully choosing to create a life you love is that you HAVE to give yourself permission to have the things you really want and LOVE.

It can be challenging... scratch that, it IS challenging when you've habituated heading straight for the sale section at Kmart. But like everything else this is an exploration journey into my own personal style in fashion, decor, beauty, home, food, fitness and other exciting things I discover along the way!

I want to encourage you to do the same, there are no limits to what you can imagine and dream up for yourself. Jump on the 'f**k yeah!' train with me and start thinking about your own style. Not what's convenient, cheap or what everyone else says is cool, but what you can't get enough of (even if you think it's lame or won't allow yourself to have it).

What's My Wardrobe, Makeup & Beauty Style?

I love dresses, sparkles and LOTS of vibrant colour, usually from ASOS, yet I rock a hoodie and black trackies most days? Oy vey. To be honest, I always let my size and shape hold me back from really allowing myself to wear those beautiful and vibrant fabrics. But that WILL change over these next 6 months because I refuse to leave my 20s without having rocked a bikini confidently!

When it comes to makeup and beauty prods, I am kind of a late bloomer. Infact I'm still blooming! I was a tomboy most of my teenage years so makeup was not a priority on my list, when I hit my 20s I just kind of mimicked my friends, I had no siblings to teach me and my mother never wears makeup! So I've been in quite a conundrum.. until now!

Something I really wanna learn is how to look after my skin easily and how to apply makeup that's natural and not layered on (sensitive skin has taught me A LOT). So be sure that a post is gonna be coming where I ask you for YOUR advice on most things beauty and makeup!

I'm excited to finally give myself the permission to raise my standards and only choose clothes, shoes, accessories, makeup and beauty products that I truly love. This is going to be a fun adventure!

What's My Fitness, Food & Spirituality Style?

I've already put my feelers out for running, yoga, sea swimming, boxing and gymnastics. It's ambitious but hey that's the thing about figuring out your style, if you don't like it you don't have to keep doing it.

Trying out fitness and food with a brand new perspective is going to be really interesting and I'm sure at times very VERY challenging. But for me it's about looking at this from an experimental 'just dipping my toes in' perspective and not just taking away all of my toys.

I love meditation and have already started exploring this further and really figuring out my style. I love guided meditation but also just zoning out to relaxing music. I find it too difficult without some sort of audio as my mind just wanders and I prefer to sit in a reeeeeally comfy chair. It's gonna be fun learning to sit for longer sessions. I hope to get to an hour at a time.

What's My Home, Decor & Office Style?

I've always wanted a beautiful home with lots of colour but I also feel like I have several different personalities when it comes to decor! On top of that I've never lived with a boy on my own so when Scott and I move out together later this year it's going to be an interesting endeavor trying to blend both of our personal styles.

I feel like I need 1000 different rooms for my home style! I'm going to play around with one room at a time and really try to bring the best harmonizing energy for that room. And since I'm going to be working from home, I'm secretly squealing at the fact I get to design my own dream office!

The inspiration is going to be endless, by the time we actually get our own place I will have EVERY detail planned right down to the skirting boards! And then I'll be able to write about the process with your fab input!

What is YOUR style hun? 

What are you obsessed with? What do you constantly browse for no reason than just to oogle at the prettiness? What makes you gasp with delight and think "Oh. my. god. I LOVE that!"? What are you constantly pinning? What colours do you gravitate towards? (Let me know in the comments below!)

Let's fill our lives with THOSE not because it's indulgent or because we can, but simply because they make us FEEL GOOD.

Soul-Goals: My Roadmap to a Life Less Ordinary

All I can say is Wow.

I am stunned and completely moved by your amazing responses to my last post. Your emails, facebook messages and comments have uplifted my spirit and given me so much hope. I feel so supported and understood and from the bottom of my heart I thank you for reaching out to me. You are truly an amazing person.

With any journey, there needs to be some sort of a roadmap (even if incredibly vague). Deep down, most of us know how we want to feel in our dream life and so I'm using that as my baseline for mapping my own journey! (If you're not sure of how you want to feel, I highly recommend you get The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte).

I have three core soul-goals I really want to achieve. They're biggies, but I know they will make a huge difference to my life if I just start heading in the direction of them. I know it's not about 'being' anything or 'getting' anywhere nor is it in any way about 'perfection'. These are the goals and achievements my soul craves.

Soul-Goal #1: Make My Wellness a Priority

Self Care: I have neglected myself for far too long. I 100% believe in self love and self care and even know the true benefits of what 'taking care of yourself' does to your life, yet I still let it go by the way side. I know all of these things make me feel good, I just keep avoiding them. I don't know if it's out of fear or laziness but you can bet your ass I am going to make a conscious effort to change this. Bring on daily meditation, mini spa treatments & time for 'play' every day!

Get Active + Have a Love Affair With Food: Call it exercise, fitness or working out, I personally want to move away from those definitions because I associate negatively to them. For me it's about re-connecting with my body and just being active. I've  had terrible body and weight issues, I've shunned, b*tched and picked on her for so long & it hasn't done my well-being any favors. I've recently come to discover I am an emotional eater. The days leading up to my meltdown I was shoving chocolate down like it wasn't going to be produced anymore. I had no idea why but after I let it all out, my eating patterns returned to normal. I don't believe in deprivation or dieting, I'm excited about trying on the new 80/20 lifestyle for size. I think it's a winner.

Make My Home A Beautiful Love Nest: Gotta say, never in a million years thought I'd ever wanna make a love nest. But as I've gotten older I realize just how important your living environment is so I'm going to discover my personal style and figure out my taste in decor. I will bring more of the colours that make me feel alive as well as finally create my dream wardrobe. No more cheap clothes that will do for now. I'm going to create the most fun, beautiful and romantic way of living.


 Soul-Goal #2: Create even more of an EPIC Love Story

Sexy Dates: One of my favourite things to do with my man is our date nights. It could be dinner and a movie, glow in the dark mini-golf or a night at a boutique hotel. I really want to focus more on this and create even more beautiful, meaningful and sexy dates.

Romantic Adventures: Due to finances we haven't been able to get away as much as previous years. It can sometimes really take a toll on the romance in a relationship but that's why I'm going to spend these next 6 months cultivating new and romantic ways we can go on adventures, even if it's in our own backyard! Nothing delights me more than surprising my man with a fun gift or a beautiful dinner so I want to make a conscious effort to do it more often. Especially for small celebrations that we tend to shrug off. We're both working toward things were so deeply passionate about, so when either of us make a little progress - it's going to be made into a party!


Soul-Goal #3: Build a Beautiful & Fun Lifestyle Biz

Heart-Centered Blogging: I'm going to write more posts from my heart than anything. I want to be as real and authentic as I can possibly be about the subjects I'm going to be writing about. I aim to make this blog a buzzing community of young fun-loving, ambitious and confident women who wanna take on life by the horns.


Abundance: As with any business comes abundance and money. In the next 6 months I want to not only transform my life but my business as well. I want to create an incredible lifestyle business that is inspiring, evoking & loveable. Bring it.


If you have the courage, I would really (really) be honored if you shared some of your soul-goals with me in the comments below. This is your first step in showing up for yourself, declaring what you want (and don't want) even if you're not 100% sure of it. Let's celebrate this first step by standing up for ourselves. I know you can do it hun!

All images sourced here

My EPIC Melt Down

You know that moment when you're non-chalantly cradling yourself in the corner of your bedroom, in the dark, shaking hysterically, LIKE A CRAZY PERSON, and suddenly he walks through the door and you sort of panic because you know that this looks really bad - horrifying actually - like a snippet out of The Conjuring. And you don't quite know how he's going to react but you can't shake yourself out of it, and anyway if you just get up act like nothing was completely disturbing about that, holy shit you WILL actually look like a lunatic!

Not to mention, who in their life has ever hit rock bottom gracefully? No one, ever!

So you're here.

Where I was.

What do you do now?

When you feel so overwhelmingly anxious you can't bring yourself to leave the house?

When you can't stop worrying endlessly about your relationship?

When you don't actually know why you're so unhappy or why you feel helpless to do anything about it?

What do you do when you're so burdened by inertia, you can't see straight?

Make a promise.

To yourself.

Not a goal or an objective with a trillion micro details.

A promise.

That no matter how bad it gets, no matter how emotional, confusing, challenging or surprising it becomes - you're going to break out of it.

You're gonna get the old you back.

And then keep that promise to yourself.

Work at it.

Dedicate yourself to you.

Re-explore who you are, who you used to be.

Change your surroundings, your environment.

Whatever isn't making you happy right now, let it go, get rid of it.

Figure out what exhilarates you, gives you butterflies and makes you snort-laugh till your ribs sting.

Go on an epic adventure with yourself & watch as you slowly but surely change back into the vibrant, bubbly, happy-go-lucky person you used to be - with a few extra improved add-ons I might add. 

Focus on you, on how you feel about yourself, your love for your life.

You'll stumble, many times in fact, that's certain.

But keep going, you'll get there.

Live Fabulously: Creating a life on your terms! (Interview with Elaine Sarantakos)

I cannot contain my excitement for todays epic interview in the Girl Power Series! You are about to meet a woman who I have been obsessed with for years! Her name is Elaine Sarantakos, she is a fabulous living coach and spends her time traveling the world to exotic locations. I know, how exciting right!?

In this interview you will learn how you can start to live a fabulous life on your terms, how possible it is to do work you love & travel the world and 3 core habits to adapt that will change your life! Leggo!

1. You are a FABULOUS living AND travelling coach! What made you decide to combine those two things?

It's not really that I am saying I am fabulous, but saying that anyone can create their fabulous life. My fabulous life includes having lots of travel in it, which many be different than someone else's definition.

Your job is to create the definition of what you think fabulous living is, and align your life with the definition, so that you are in harmony with it. I like to inspire people to live out their dreams through my travel stories and videos.

2. How is it that you can just travel around the world constantly? What's your secret?

At different points in my life, I have travelled in different ways that are not traditional, which allowed me to constantly be travelling. When I was 16 years old I did an exchange program to Mexico for three months to learn Spanish. After high school I studied Hotel Management in Athens, Greece for three years at a Swiss hotel school, and in the summers was on the Greek islands.

Having studied Hotel Management, I then worked in the Cayman Islands for a year, following with a year in the Canadian Rockies. I was also an Au-Pair in Spain for three months the summer of 2009.

In 2011, I wanted to create a travel reality project/dream. I created a reality where I worked three weeks a month in Toronto and the last week of every month I went away on vacation blogging and vlogging.

I manifested cheap flights, and used couchsurfing and hotels for my accommodation to make this possible. It was a monthly adventure one after another having 12 vacation, in 12 months.

3. If I wanted to mimic a similar AMAZING lifestyle just like you, how do you recommend I should go about it?

Right now I am not travelling every month. My "travel reality" was a dream project that I had for one year. I think the best way to mimic this lifestyle is to take advantage of opportunities that are out there. Anyone can google and find a plethora of travel related things to do, and jobs to work abroad.

You need to want it and be open to it. In terms of the monthly travels, it doesn't  matter what the work you are actually doing is, rather the schedule you have. If you have the space, you can create the lifestyle.

4. What is the craziest travelling experience you've manifested in your life so far?

I have had lots of crazy travelling experiences I've manifested from three months in Spain after seeing the movie Vicky Cristina Barcelona and deciding the following day to leave, to creating a reality of going on vacation once a month.

One of my earliest manifestations was when I was 12 years old after returning back to Canada after a trip to Greece. I thought Greece was so beautiful, and I told my Mother after high school I was going to move there. I calculated the days to finishing grade 12 and make a calendar.

For the first weeks I would cross of the days. It wasn't until a few years after I came back from living in Greece a few years later, that I realized I manifested and lived in Greece after high school from my thoughts when I was 12 years old. That was REALLY COOL!

5. What is your favourite country/city you've visited so far and where is somewhere new you would love to go?

I don't have a favourite country because I appreciate different things for different reasons when travelling to places. I can't compare the Canadian Rockies to Dubai, where you have natural and man-made land.

I do know that I prefer old places full of history and stories of the past versus man-made or new places. I LOVE European architecture. My two places that come instantly on my mind are India and Argentina for new places to visit.

6. Alright, let's get deep for a moment - do you sometimes get tired of moving from place to place?

Yes, I do get tired at times. Not all of my travels have had me travelling constantly which helps. Last week I had a flight to Chicago, which I cancelled because I was busy with things in Toronto and was tired to go. Imagine being tired to travel? :P

7. Do you believe that particular countries and places have a profound spiritual effect on you?

Whenever I travel to Greece, I have this feeling that I can't explain. Being born in Canada, and being of Greek heritage I have a connection for sure.

I love Canada and feel it's my home ( It will forever be my home. I always get so happy when I land in YYZ.), but when I land in Greece it's my soul. It's as if in front of ancient ruins all of my being, and soul rejoices. :)

8. What is one core thing you LOVE to teach your coaching clients who want what you've got?

I have 3 core things!!!

1. I always teach that everything happens in baby steps. Don't get scared looking at how big the goal is, but work on the small steps you can do today.


2. Take ACTION. Nothing happens unless you take action. You have to use the words ending in ING!!!!


3. No one just changes their career instantly from working to being a full-time entrepreneur. Things take time which is all perfect timing. You need to work while learning or taking a course, then you need to build for example a site, and so on and so on. Don't think in your head you need to make x amount of money before you start working on your business idea.
   
   P.S Entrepreneurs are always working!

9. Do you have any juicy tips for those wanting to start making change in their lives even if they don't want to travel?

I don't only do travel coaching, but personal life coaching. A juicy tip would be to start becoming clear of what your own definition of fabulous living is and live it.

No one can tell you how to live your fabulous life because they have not had the same experiences you have had, nor preferences of interests. Become clear and live it!

10. Where on the web can we find you?

You can find me at Fabulous Living Coach, watch me on youtube, follow me on twitter, pinterest and facebook.

11. Ever thought about coming to New Zealand? ;)

Yes of course New Zealand is on my bucket list! I have my cousins wedding in Melbourne next February of 2014, so I will be coming. Most of my family in the world lives down under! :)

I was raised in Australia until I was 9, and have an Aussie passport. I know people could never imagine that with my Canadian accent, but I was a little girl playing under a gum tree and I can sing you the Australian National Anthem and Waltzing Matilda. :P

The simplest, most effective way to deal with sh*tty experiences.

I handle stress about as well as a 2yr old handles her toys being taken off her. Not well.

I had this one experience not long ago where everything just seemed to go wrong. It felt like no matter what I did or how much I tried to make it better (with meditation, forgiveness, good thoughts etc) it would not improve. In fact it got worse!

So I switched to complaining, b*tching and getting what I really thought off my chest thinking that maybe that's what I needed to do. That didn't work either.

It's like the universe was literally taking a giant sh*t on my face (Excuse the vulgarity, but that's exactly what I blurted out to a friend. We both laughed hysterically).

But ya know, it's inevitable that we're all gonna have those moments in life when sh*t hits the fan and we just gotta deal with it the best we can.

As you might imagine, that didn't sit too well with me.

So instead I went looking for (more) solutions.

Maybe you found out your boyfriend has cheated on you or maybe you had a fight with your mother. You could have just made the most epic mistake at work or just seem to have one sh*t thing happening after the other to you. Either way I am proud to announce that I FINALLY discovered a simple (yet effective) way to deal with those experiences.

WARNING: You may not like it because it requires action on your part.

How to Eliminate Stress & Feeling Like Sh*t all the Time

1) Ask yourself, "How did this experience make me feel?", and write down everything you felt.

Was it anger, frustration or helplessness? Did you feel like you just wanted to burst out in tears? Did you just want to scream or hit something? Get specific and just run it like pure consciousness. This is an insanely awesome exercise to get those deep set feelings off your chest and out of you.

2) Knowing how it made you feel, now write down how would prefer to feel instead.

If this situation could have gone differently, would you have prefered to feel at ease, stressless or relaxed? Would you rather feel at peace or just forget the whole thing? This part of the exercise is crucial to helping you feel better about it.

3) And lastly referring to the previous list, what are 2 - 3 things that you can do right now that would make you feel better?

This is not about finding solutions, it's about finding a way for YOU to feel better right now. So if you prefered to feel relaxed, maybe you could take a bath or go and get a massage. If you wrote down that you'd be happier if you felt at ease, maybe a meditation session is a great idea or buying yourself some beautiful flowers for your dining room.

This is my instant stress-solver, sure it doesn't eliminate the actual sh*tty situation that has happened, but it's never about the situation in the first place. It's about how YOU feel about what's happened.

So if you can get yourself into a better feeling place about this stressful experience by using this exercise, you my dear have successfully learned how to think in a completely new way.

Change your outlook, change your life. (click to tweet)

Your action plan today is to tell me what is one thing you are going to do to make yourself feel better in your stressful situation. What is something that'd make you feel FANTASTIC right now? I bet it's not moping in bed!

How to Create A Life You Friggin' Love!

Over the last few months I have been experimenting with different methods and practices to see what would happen to my life when I added these new ways of being.

I didn't really expect much to change, maybe a slight mood boost but that was about it. Little did I know how dramatic the results would be and how different I would feel.

Let's just say I am (finally) well on my way to creating a life I friggin' love.

I figured this advice may come in handy for you also so by all means, take these strategies and play with them!

How to Create a Life You Friggin' Love

Cut your BS & start doing the things you keep putting off: It's seriously like I was just waiting, waiting, waiting for something to happen so that I could go forth and finally live the life I'd always wanted.

Except that waiting gets you nowhere. Like waiting to get promoted, waiting to get proposed to or waiting to start writing again. It just doesn't happen without action mate. If there's something you want you gotta make some steps (even if they're mini) towards it.

I have wanted to get back into sewing and crafting for MONTHS but kept putting it off for later as there were more important things to do like browse the web...... When I finally stopped making up excuses and sat my ass down to the sewing machine, I had so much fun!


Allow yourself to have what you really want: I went on a MAD shopping spree and rather than buying clothes that I kinda liked but bought because they were super cheap, I decided not to look at the price and instead go from first appearances.

If I saw something that made me gasp and think, "Oh. my. god. I LOVE that!!!", then I had to try that on! Don't get me wrong, it was super challenging to switch from cheapo wait-till-I'm-rich-and-hot mode. And some of the things I loved were damn pricey, but I shrugged it off and said 'If I can't afford it now I'll save for it because I am worth it'.

When I owned that statement my 'feel good' levels raised dramatically! I was so used to playing small with my clothing that making that one little shift changed my whole vibration, permanently!


Change your environment: There's a wonderful quote I heard my girl Sarah Jenks say and it goes, "One of the best ways to change your life is to change your environment. And this changes you." (click to tweet).

I changed my usual routine of, wake up, eat breakfast, work, work, work, have dinner, watch some fave shows, bed, to, wake up, green smoothie, meditation, a little work, nature walk, a little more work, play time, some work again, dinner, relax, read, bath, bed.

My whole energy and presence changed, it was literally like I was living a whole new life. I felt so damn good about my days because i was doing something different! You see, I don't think we're meant to do the same thing day in and day out for long periods of time. I think we have to change our routines regularly so we don't wind up becoming like caged animals. After years of being held in captivity you see their spirits die and they lose the fight in their eyes.


Get clear like a psychic: It's like visualizing in High Definition. Everything is crystal-fricken-clear. Think about it, when you've been vague and unclear, you usually get vague and unclear results back.

Like that time you told that guy you kinda might like him and expected him to declare his undying love for you but instead he responded really awkwardly and you left the conversation not knowing if it was a good sign or a bad sign. I KNOW YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

You need to know what you want, what you really want. Not what you think is enough, nor what others say you should want. Get clear and then embody it, cement it to you and then drop it.

It's not our job to keep reminding the universe what we ordered, It's our job to know who we really are and what we really want and go about our lives. The universe has got your back and the least amount of resistance you have to what you want, the better.


Talk to the universe: I used to worry that I was bothering the universe when I was asking for things. I somehow got it into my head that you ask for what you want and no more because the universe has got bigger things to worry about. I seriously have no idea where that belief came from, but it was there.

I decided one night that I'd just talk to the universe (you can do it in your mind or out loud) and just chatted about random stuff like what I'm getting up to today and how bad I need a haircut. And what I found was that the more I talked to it, the more the universe became like a friend. It's like we got to know each other.

The universe was no longer this busy working man strapped for time but an actual friend I could joke around with. When that happened, manifesting things became easier and things felt more flowing.

The universe is just another way to describe you and your source/infinite intelligence. What you're actually doing is cultivating a relationship with yourself, your befriending yourself and therefore you are able to drop blocks you have with yourself which let's the manifesting process slip right through the gap. Pretty cool huh?


In the comments below, I’d love to hear which strategy you're gonna take on and how you feel about it!

How to Let Go of the Drama & Become a Lioness (Interview with Kayla Ramsay)

OMG, I'm crazy excited for today's Girl Power series post! You know why? Because I am interview a fellow KIWI!!!! Yes, another New Zealand who is on the path of self improvement! It's like a found a new sister in my homeland, awwww.

Her name is Kayla Ramsay and she is one to watch. She writes the most beautiful poetry I've ever read. And she has that spark, that something that tells you without words that she's going places. Welcome Kayla!

1) Since discovering you I have become OBSESSED with your work. You write the most beautiful poetry I've read in a loooooong time & your writing is like a decadent truffle. Needless to say, I love you. Tell us what made you start writing?

Thanks Elise! I’ve been writing stories since I was old enough to hold a pencil. They were always highly imaginative but as I got older, the topics got darker and darker. I stopped writing when I was about 20 because I hadn’t yet learned to embrace or accept the pain that came out in my words.

In January of this year, I knew it was time for me to start writing again, but I didn’t know where to start. One night as I was lying awake in bed, the title of my book came to me. As soon as I had the title, the rest of the book followed all at once. I had to dictate it into my phone. The funny thing is that the book involves the retelling and reframing of the stories I wrote when I was younger. It almost feels as though the book was already decided before I was born.

I think I feel compelled to write because it’s how I make sense of things. Having dyspraxia means I not only think in quite an obsessive, detailed way, but I’m also unable to grasp any of those thoughts. It’s kind of like a having a room filled with butterflies, and trying to count or group them into categories. I have to pin them down in word form, so I can create order.

The other reason is because I feel things so intensely. If I don’t write them down, I feel like I’ll combust. My poetry is like short bursts of steam – ideal for when I’m too fired up and impatient to write it all down in a lengthy way! 

In summary, I do it because it's the only thing I want to do. Because writing can fill my heart, and my heart can fill the page.

2) You've overcome such adversity in your life, what were some of the key turning points that made you decide to change? 

If I really look back, I’ve had countless turning points. Despite my main struggle being with self-loathing, I’ve always fought for my own right to happiness. I was 12 when I first asked my parents to take me to a counsellor. Since then I have actively sought help through all means possible. I saw more than a dozen professionals and even completed a psychology degree.

The reason these interventions never “worked” was because recovery was not my lesson. Every time I became well I was struck down by another challenge – whether it was physical illness, mental illness or some kind of trauma. I was being given the same lesson over and over again because I wasn’t learning it; and that lesson was that recovery is not a permanent thing. Pain is as much a part of life as joy and when you can come to embrace and accept it, then and only then can you find peace.

3) What would be your biggest tip(s) for someone going through something similar?

Remember all the best things are born out of darkness. Every star starts out as a murky cloud of interstellar dust but when the heat is turned up and the pressure increases, it explodes into a massive, luminous sphere. 

Have hope when things are at their worst - it's a sign that something far better is to come. You're not having a breakdown, you're having a breakthrough. Just ride it out.

4) What are 5 habits you believe every woman in the world should learn to adapt?

1. Learn to breathe out the pain: We women go through a lot of pain in our lives. Pain can bring with it trauma and suffering or healing and learning – but if you can use it instead of resist it, you can make it a more positive, transformative experience.
2. Understand that love is always the answer: Learn to forgive others unconditionally. Respond to anger with love. Respond to hatred with love. By doing so you’re healing both yourself and others.
3. Realise that loving someone unconditionally means you don’t need them to love you back.
4. Know that you are a Lioness: Female energy is not a softness but a strength, and that strength is infinite.
5. Help yourself, then others: You can't take care of others unless you take care of yourself first. Self-nurturing is not a selfish act.

5) What is the best piece of wisdom you've ever heard?

I usually receive the right wisdom at the right time. I love when people give it to me straight; a good friend told me a few months back, “let go of the drama” and that was just what I needed to hear! But if I was going to stick to one piece of advice it would be to trust your own instinct and never hand over your power. Grace won’t take you where you can’t walk; if you’re faced with a challenge, you can handle it. Step up and stand up for yourself.

6) What's your advice for someone who is ready to give up and revert back to their old habits?

Self-talk. We’ve got a number of guiding voices within ourselves and sometimes we just need to call upon the right one. What you need in this case is the compassionate but firm version of you. The one who says, “You’re better than this. Remember?” Have a conversation with them. Let them do the talking. Bring back that sense of your own empowerment.

7) What do you love to do on days you don't feel so great?

I usually meditate and just ride it out because I’m probably going through some sort of necessary process. If the blues stick around for too long then I’ll call upon a few tricks like waking up to watch the sunrise, listening to music, dancing, singing or exercising.

8) Who and what inspires you every day?

I find my best inspiration in nature. If you sit outdoors and just watch the plants, bugs and animals for a while, you’ll learn a lot from them. Things don’t have to be as complicated as we like to make them!

9) What's something BIG you wanna manifest and why?

I’ve learned that making wishes for my life is a bit like trying to paint a picture when I can only see 5% of the palette. I prefer to trust that I’m part of a plan more perfect than I can imagine, and allow myself to be as willing a participant as possible. So instead of manifesting, I see my goals and ambitions as part of an open conversation with the universe. Currently we’re in discussions about me publishing my book, buying a house in the country and running an animal rehabilitation centre!

10) What are your favourite things to do on a rainy day?

The sound of the rain is so soothing, so days like this are a great excuse to unwind. Have you ever noticed how otherwise energetic animals always (or only) sleep on rainy days? It’s almost like you have no choice but to hibernate. It's a good time to rest.

Is Your Relationship A Train-Wreck?

Once a year I like to watch one of my favourite movies of all time and absolutely ball my eyes out. The movie I speak of is called P.S I love you. I think you may have heard of it?

It's that movie that makes us book the next flight to Ireland in search of any man that looks like Gerard Butler and Jeffrey Dean Morgan to sweep us off our feet. Drool. Coincidentally my boyfriend just so happens to be tall, dark, sexy as hell, Irish and handsome. Jackpot baby!

But as much as we'd LOVE to have a relationship as profound as Holly's and Gerry's, the painful truth is that relationships don't just happen like that.

My early 20s conversations with my girlfriends were a mixtape of how miserable I was being in love with somebody who didn't love me back, how much I knew he was it or how if I just did this or said that or declared this, everything would change.

Needless to say my love life was a train-wreck.

Not long ago when I felt the fear of losing my current relationship due to my own insecurity (again), I had only two options.

1) Let the fear barrage through me & lose my relationship.

2) Ignore my habituated victim-mode, grab the reins & take action.

Can you tell which option I took?

Instead of crying myself to sleep, asking my boyfriend if he really loved me for the millionth time and picturing ways I would get back at him for "hurting me", I did the unthinkable. I went out and got a life.

I took the bull by it's balls and I got my ass to work. I declared to myself that there was no way in HELL I was gonna lose this relationship to the same self-sabotaging pattern again! The only way that would happen is if someone cheats, comes out of the closet or dies because this relationship was NOT ending because I was too needy.

So I googled every fear I had and ways to overcome it, I read a ton of books on love, sex and relationships, I sought out counseling, I joined a tennis club, I signed up to dance classes, I auditioned for a theatre show and I hung out with my friends more often.

And you know what getting a life did to my relationship? It made it f**king solid. We became closer, more intimate, more free with each other and best of all eliminated ALL neediness. Victory! Now we are happier, stronger and more in love than ever!

I turned my fear and my insecurity into a f**king EPIC love story. I took control and I changed my fate.

Is your relationship heading down a similar path? Or is it already a train-wreck? Ask yourself:

How can I take back the reins and turn my relationship into a f**king EPIC love story?

You deserve an AMAZING relationship filled with so much love, you have the power to change it into something OUTSTANDING, so no more depriving yourself of that okay?

If you're craving connection, join that book club and make some new friends. If you're pining for companionship, volunteer at an animal shelter. If you're missing familiarity, create a new boundary of comfortable. And if you're longing for excitement, dust off your bucket list and go and explore the world.

Now it's your turn: In the comments below, tell me one thing you're gonna do to start making your relationship an EPIC love story. I can't wait to hear your ideas!

How To Glitter Bomb Your Life With Love (Interview with Eyenie Schultz)

Argh! It's excitement all around! You know why? Because this week on Girl Power series I've got one of my fave self-improvement babes ready to dish to you her best kept secrets! Her name is Eyenie, (Ikr right, AMAZEBALLS name!), she lives in Paris, (my dream!) and she is hosting her very first retreat (something I want to do in the near future!) in Costa Rica!!!

Um can I say girl-crush right now?

In this interview you will learn how to start creating positive (glitter love bomb) change in your life and how to bust out of a funk. You'll also discover why mindset and beauty play important factors in creating a life you love and a crazy awesome tool that'll help manifest the things you want.

You are the fun and loving creator of Lucid Musing where you help unicorns believe in themselves, what made you venture down this path?

First, I want to say how effing excited and honored I am to be doing this interview with you Elise! (Teehee! Thanx Eyenie!x)

Here goes…

Oy vey, it’s a looooong story as you can imagine, but I’ll give you the nitty gritty. It’s funny because now when I look back on it, it’s as if I awakened from this intense trance or something…

I grew up being the good girl, dutiful daughter and rule follower because I sought approval and praise and accolades and high-fives to satisfy my ego. I did “everything I was supposed to do”—and it made me feel inadequate, unworthy, ugly, and like a freak show. It kept me frozen in my tracks.

I’ve always had this intense need to show other people how amazing and beautiful they are—to dazzle people by highlighting what’s best about them. I didn’t know what to do with that, and I had no idea that doing anything with it was even an option!

After years of corporate work and crying in my cubicle or in the hall on my way to the bathroom singing Bjork’s “There’s More to Life Than This”, I realized that I wanted…no, YEARNED to be a life coach! The idea scared the frick frack crapola out of me, and I was frozen, not wanting to take action, so I just hung out knowing that I really wanted to do this amazing work, but kept on plugging away at the “should”…

It hurts my guts to see other women totally missing out on their beauty and WOWness…everything that makes them magical unicorns! My mission with LucidMusing is to help women see how beautiful, dreamy, crushworthy, strong they are so they can go after what they want in life. Every woman is a magical unicorn, but so many of them don’t know it….

What inspired you to start teaching your message?

When I found out I was pregnant, I experienced a deep shift in my mindset. I realized that I wanted to be a bright-n-shiny example of “YES! YOU CAN LIVE YOUR DREAM!” and “YOU CREATE YOUR REALITY!” and “YOU CAN MAKE MONEY BY DOING WHAT YOU LOVE AND BEING OF SERVICE!” for my tiny human.

So, I grabbed my, well, proverbial cojones, and signed up to get my life coaching certification. Voila, the rest has been a result of that first mega important step!

Every single woman has amazing magical powers, beauty, strength, passion to be lived…and when I see them stuck like I used to be, feeling inadequate and/or seeking approval instead of doing what makes them gush with joy and giddiness, my first instinct is to show them all the WOW things they have going for them so that they can start truly living their lives, loving themselves and rocking all they have to rock with Technicolor confidence!

What do you believe is an important factor to creating an awesome life?

Well, I have two HUGE ones: First is MINDSET and paying attention to the thoughts that are keeping you from living vibrantly, happily.

If you lug around the mindset, “I’m not enough and life is hard!” then that’s the reality you create for yourself. When you shift this to, “I am perfectly me and I live every day with flow and ease!” it seriously is a game-changer!! YAY!

The second thing is BEAUTY. Focus on it, create more of it, see it in yourself and in others, give it away, feel it, touch it, smell it, be grateful for it. The more you do all of this, the more beauty you will float in, and the happier and more confident you will feel!

Do you have a daily ritual you like to do? If so, what are some things you do each day?

Girl, you know I do! My routine varies a little, but essentially I eat a lovely breakfast including a crazy juice mix (whatever I have available, in it goes along with some chia, ginger, flax seeds, cinnamon and loads of greens!) I often put on some music in the background to make it an event and set the tone for the day.

Then I do some meditating to open my heart and connect to the Earth and to the Universe/Source/Kosmos/God and set the intention for the day, like, “Today I am productive, but give myself space for fun!” I move my body to shake out any negative or yucky stuff. Most mornings I write a few declarations in my manifestation journal and/or spend a few minutes repeating some of the lovely things I would like to invite into my life.

Oh! And I always light a candle and some incense (I’m hooked on coconut scented lately, it is simply wowy zowy!!!!) Recently, I started doing exercise again, so after that about 20-minute experience, I do some kick-ass cardio or interval training. Voila!

What are your tips for someone who wants to start making positive change in their lives?

If you are truly ready to make change, the first thing you can do is accept that all things that are out of your circle of control (anything that is not decided/done/undone by you directly) is the way it is, and you cannot change it. Woooh, I even have to take a breath after that because it’s big.

Certain things, circumstances, people simply will not change, so why spend so much of your time, energy and mental space worrying about it? Just release it and know it is perfect as it is.

The second thing I would recommend is really focusing on today. The past happened, and the future is ahead, and that’s great, but what can you do *today* to make your existence a more pleasant one?

Instead of buying fast food and eating in your car thinking about how much your job sucks (I’ve been guilty of that, so I ain’t judgin’!), buy a salad, and take your headphones to eat at a nearby park and think of everything that *is* going right in your life. It’s these tiny experiences that actually make up the whole of your life!

Sometimes we don't feel so fantastic, what are some of your tips to help get out of the funkiness?

When we feel icky, many times the first thing we want to do is just lie down, eat bad stuff and watch TV.

We mope and it feels like our body can barely keep itself up! An easy peasy and really effective fix for this is to MOVE! Put on a song that you find irresistible to dance to, and make yourself stand up and start dancing. Once you get over the whole, “but I don’t feel like dancing”, the song’ll getcha, and you’ll get your groove on.

Make sure to jump and shake out your hands and legs to move any stuck energy around. If you don’t have music available, jump up and down shaking your arms and legs and throw some hip swivels in if you can. Another thing that works like magic is taking like 2 minutes to list 10 or 15 things that you are grateful for, that make you feel abundant, and that are good in your life.

They can be really mega simple, like, breakfast was delicious this morning, my neighbor told me my hair looks nice, the flowers I bought smell delightful. It shifts your focus and cures yuckiness stat!

What are your 5 FAAAAAAVE things to do on a mellow day?

Ooooh! Let me think, you good question-asker! I’m imagining this mellow day as rainy..

Here’s my list in no particular order:

1. Craft! I love to make things out of scraps and what may seem to be junk. The hot glue gun is my pal. We go way back.
2. Read and write.
3. Play with my tiny dancer.
4. Have a spontaneous dance party or magical meal (candles, music, even dress up sometimes)
5. Go on a dreamy enchanted forest/river/urban paradise walk

What's a magically amazing thing that has happened to you in your life?

Right after college I decided I wanted to work and live in France for a year. I bought my plane ticket and committed to sharing an apartment with a friend even though I had no idea where I would work, or how I would get my visa to stay for an entire year. I contacted the US Embassy in Paris to see if they had any jobs I could apply for, and they had nothing. Also, I had no money to take with me.

It was one week before I was supposed to leave for a year, and I was, uh, freaking out! No job lined up in France, no visa, no mula. Yowzers. So, I decided to chant like nobody’s business. I did it every single day, multiple times believing that I would magically get a visa, a job and money and that everything would be ok. Three days before my departure, I got an unexpected and beyond generous check in the mail from an old high school teacher as a college graduation gift—I was stunned and sooo grateful. A total shocker. Money—check!

Then, a couple days later I received an email about a job as an assistant that would allow me to apply for my work visa. It came from someone who I would have never thought to ask. Job—check! I contacted the embassy to let them know I had a job, and the employee said that even though I had a job lined up, it would take at least a month to process the paperwork for my visa…OH NO! A frick frack month? I was panicking because I had no money to change my ticket and would need to send my friend rent for the apartment.

I’m not sure why, but she called me later that day and said that she had called in a favor and would process my visa THE SAME DAY and overnight it to me. I got it the morning of my flight!!! Visa—check!!!! It worked out beautifully because I stopped and just believed (while taking inspired action, of course!) Manifestation at its finest! Toots, I still get goose-bumps just thinking about it!

Where is your favourite place to go in the world and why?

My grandparents’ house in Mexico City. I would go there every summer when I was a little kid.

There was always singing, dancing, piano playing, dress up! My grandmother is the one who taught me all about showing others how to see and showcase their beauty. She also taught me about manifesting and believing that anything is possible as well as making the moment as pleasant as possible.

 I remember there was a hammock outside in the backyard, and I used to swing on it and would imagine swinging so high that I’d shoot up to the sky and start flying. It’s still an overall magical, creative place for me.

What are 5 essential habits/beliefs you believe women should adapt in their lives?

Man alive, this is a good one! Here goes:

1. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Find a word that means “beautiful” to you, and OWN IT! It doesn’t matter if you’re not “perfect” or if you think you don’t meet someone’s expectations—all that matters is what YOU think!!! Seriously!
2. Make decisions + take action from a space of LOVE not FEAR. Love for yourself, others, life… When we do things based on fear, the outcome ain’t pretty! We end up doing things that don’t feel good, and that can get messy and mucked up. Acting from LOVE can be difficult at first, but it’s wonderful for your confidence, self-love and overall happy dappy living.
3. Kick negative self-talk to the curb. Pay attention to yucky thoughts you have repeatedly that make you feel like crapola, and replace them and breath. They aren’t “real” or “true”…but they make you react and live as if they were. Choose positive, uplifting, kick-ass motivating thoughts that make you feel lovely and all “hell yeah!” instead!
4. Be grateful! Look around you every live long day and make note of all the dreamy, floaty, wow in your life! If you can keep it logged in a gratitude jar or journal, all the better for easy reference when you’re having a yuck day or moment.
5. Send glitter bombs of love. When you want to talk smack about or to someone, or when you find yourself annoyed, send the person (or yourself!) a blessing and some light instead! You’ll be surprised at how much better you feel about the world and yourself.
6. BONUS!! I just couldn’t resist this one because it is SO important! Remember to HAVE FUN!! It’s sacred and vital to a happy and healthy life! Make room for it in your agenda, seek it out, create it, invoke and invite it in, say yes to it! FUN is just as important as being productive, working, honoring your commitments, etc. So off you go to have some!!!

YAY!!