DON'T Make a Resolution to Lose Weight

Just don't do it. Don't do that to yourself.

There is so much negativity tied up in that one declaration.

1. You're telling yourself you're not good enough now.
2. You're purposely setting yourself up to fail.
3. It makes you feel bad about yourself.

All great indicators not to make that damn resolution.

Instead, make a resolution to work on your thoughts, to better how you feel and do all the fun and exciting things you would do if you were already thin. Stop waiting on the weight. Go to the root of the problem, not the cause.

Believe it or not, those three examples lead to weight loss. Say whaaat? You didn't see anything about weight loss in there!

Yup, training your mind and not your ass and doing before getting is a more healthy way to lose weight but also the fastest way to lose weight..

How do I figure that?

As Marianne Williamson and Tony Robbins both say.. "Your body is a response to your thoughts, not the other way around."

Read that again; Your body is a response to your thoughts.

Your thoughts are the cause of your wanting to lose weight (or gain it), your body isn't!! Poor thing is just responding to what you're thinking.

So my friend, if your resolution is to lose the weight or get fit..

Intend to work on the mind because until you start making changes to your psychology you'll yo-yo around diets and exercise. You'll lose the weight only to gain it back because you didn't work on the foundation.

AND

Give yourself permission to do the things you wanna do when you're thin, right now. That's actually the real secret to weight loss, letting yourself be who you truly are. So stop waiting on the weight and go out and buy that hot dress, become self employed, pursue your dancing dreams and LIVE. The point of life is to LIVE, not wait till everything is perfectly lined up.

Be kind to yourself over these holidays, use my favourite affirmation "I am perfect the way I am as I am"

Don't beat yourself up for not sticking to your daily practice/exercise routine/diet over this period. This time is about relaxation, recuperation and being with loved ones.

Your worth is not tied up in your size, your weight or body image. You are perfect now.

Let's make 2013 the year we stop punishing ourselves. I'm with you on this one too buddy.


Elise xo

The Good Girl's Guide to Dealing With Jealousy

Jealousy & envy can hit the best of us at the most inconvenient times.

Have you ever been on a really good streak and then all of a sudden you see someone doing it harder, better and faster and you're like "Wtf!? What about me!?", or worse, "That fucking bitch, who does she think she is?!? I can do SO MUCH BETTER. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!".

Wow have we all been there.

I can tell you about a few occasions I've had where I've been slapped in the face with the green eyed monster. It sucked balls. Big hairy balls.

In the early days when I was new to the acting industry, I made a new friend who was also an actress. She was bubbly and funny just like me and we hit it off straight away. We looked NOTHING alike and we totally supported each other through our journey.

Over time I noticed that she was getting a lot of auditions, there just seemed to be more work for her type. In the beginning I thought nothing of it and that my time would come. But after a while I started getting impatient wondering when my auditions were gonna come.

I started mentally noting down all the auditions she had and how many she got, it was my way of calculating how much self loathing I was gonna take into the shower that day. I became obsessed with comparing myself to her and what she was doing. 

I was driving myself nuts! Instead of concentrating on myself and my journey, I had a 24/7 subscription to what she was doing! And worst of all I made myself think that I wasn't good enough and that there wasn't anything special about me.

BIG NO NO.

Are you currently eyeing up someone else's life and all their goodies? Do you find yourself obsessing over what they're doing and achieving? Just between you and me, are you secretly jealous of their success?

This is totes normal and you should not be beating yourself up for it! Plus, I've got a few tips that'll clear this all up and get you back onto the path of YOUR awesome life!

Feel it out

We can tend to have the habit of going into serious denial when we're jealous. The funny thing is by trying to convince yourself you're not jealous, you feel more jealous. Ah frustrating!

Feelings are there for a reason, they are indicators of your awareness. Stifling them away makes them worse but going into them however, changes things up!

Allow yourself to feel the jealousy. Just feel it out. Doing this makes the feeling go away, it's crazy but it's true. You have to allow yourself to feel that part of you and once you do it's like this crazy instant shift happens and the feeling dimishes.

What are you jealous about?

So you know you're having jealousy issues and you need help. Try asking yourself what it is you're actually jealous of?

What is it about this person that's making you feel insecure and threatened? What are you scared you gonna lose? What is it about them that you feel you're missing out on? What do you want?

Understanding this about yourself helps you to think about your needs and how you can go about achieving them. You have every single thing you need, now it's time to start using those tools and resources.

Get journalling!

I LOVE my journals! And your journal is the place where you can map out your comeback plan. You answered the questions in the previous step, now's the time to create a strategy to get to where you want to be.

You should also write down your thoughts, how you feel, ideas and insight. You know the best way to work your way through this, allow yourself to do it.

What makes you awesome?

Another important thingy to do in your journal is to list out your strengths and write about what makes you so freakin' awesome!

It could be your ability to belch the alphabet or your incredible strength when it comes to athletics. Whatever it is, write it down. You are crazy talented at something, you have the beauty of the victoria's secret angels and you have the capacity to love the world - so show it to us and write it down!!

Re-focus your focus

Turn your focus all back around on to you. You're playing the role of YOU, not the audience member of someone else's life!

When you get centered back in on yourself, you forget about everyone else and your path becomes clearer. This is what being present does. So get zoned in on you in THIS moment because that's all you can take care of right now.

Potential role-model?

So, this is an extra tid-bit, some may like it, some may loathe it.

Have you ever thought about making the person you're jealous of your role-model? Have they got everything you want so much that you actually wanna wind up where they are? Why not include them in your journey? Turn it around completely  and infuse more power into your journey.

I did this with a few people I had envious feelings of and wound up becoming great friends with them AND they became a part of my journey and we both inspired each other to keep going! There seriously power in numbers.

If you start doing even one of these steps you will definitely notice a shift happening and a weight lifting and you will start getting yourself back on track!


Elise xo

The Ultimate Self Love Technique (or, Affirmations & Gratitude & Positivity Oh My!)

Affirmations are well known as a form of self-therapy to dramatically changing your psychological way of thinking about yourself. Hundreds of thousands of people recite them every day (including myself).

Gratitude has recently been scientifically proven to change your outlook on life. People who kept a gratitude journal for 3 weeks measured 25% higher on life satisfaction. They exercised more, they drank less alcohol and their family and friends noticed they were nicer to be around. The effects lasted for months from the initial 3 week period. (Stats from Marie Forleo)

Positive Energy sometimes seems like a very woo-woo concept. But in actual fact positive energy is created in specific forms of movement such as dancing, running and exercising. It's a natural release of endorphins in your body that creates a 'high'.

Now you're probably thinking 'Why the hell are you telling me about these three things?' and that is a great question!

It is because these three precious things are the main ingredients to The Ultimate Self Love Technique!

It combines affirmations with gratitude, positive energy and mirror work (which is the last ingredient + a fantastic form of self love therapy) because let's face it. Sometimes it can get really confusing (and time consuming) trying to say your affirmations, think positive thoughts then write in a gratitude journal when you've got shit to do.

That's why this Ultimate Self Love Technique is the perfect combination of the three, it's quick and easy to do!

Here's an example..



Are you in love?

Right, now your challenge is to get in front of the mirror and try exactly what young Jessica did here.

RIGHT NOW.

This is to gauge how you feel when you look at yourself in the mirror, how quick you can think of things you love about yourself and your life and how revved up you can get your energy.

After this, put it on a scale of 1 - 100, where do you think you're at right now?

We all know the goal is at 150%.

Next it's time to get out your self love journal: Write down affirmations you would like to use and things that make you insanely happy and that you really appreciate already. Make it HUGE. You can have awesome serious things as well as funny and silly things too. This is the starting list you're gonna use for the next week.

Rev yourself up with some movement: Before you begin The Ultimate Self Love Technique, you're gonna rev yourself up with some movement. Pop on your fave upbeat song *coughjustinbiebercough* and get moving. Remember the dorky dance moves I was talking about way back? Yup, use those. This is about bringing your energy up so that you can get maximum benefits from the Ultimate Self Love Technique.

Stare yourself down in the mirror: This will probably be the most confronting part of the exercise for you and that's okay. We all gotta start somewhere! Spend some time looking into your eyes in the mirror. This is an exercise that Louise Hay believes wholeheartedly in and I do as well. You are able to see through the mirror how you gauge yourself, it takes practice and this technique is going to be the perfect avenue. This is the ultimate self love secret sauce. If you can look at yourself in the mirror with love and appreciation (like this exercise is gonna give you) you're gonna be a vibrant self loving goddess!

Make it a ritual & practice everyday: Yup, if you want your life to change you gotta do it every day. You don't go to the gym once and become a pumped up body builder do you? It's making the muscle stronger. This is the key to making your life a magical 'on-purpose' event. You can do it hun!

When I started doing The Ultimate Self Love Technique I found it hard to think of stuff non stop. It wasn't until after a week of constant practice I started finding my groove!

Over time I noticed things started changing, my days were a lot more positive and little magic moments were happening all the time. My relationships became waaaay better and everything just improved. But most importantly I had a stronger sense of self.

And now? It's one of my FAVOURITE things to do each day! I literally can't wait to get out of bed to do my lil dance and incantation. It's incredibly liberating and I know you will find it seriously helpful to your self love practice.


Elise xo